Inner Work Makes the Dream Work: The 4 steps to bring your dreams to life
You may have heard it said “Team Work Makes the Dream Work” – perhaps it does…..
But if you really want to achieve your goals, it’s in the inner work. Inner Work Makes the Dream Work.
What is YOUR goal? A deep and meaningful relationship? A healthy and strong body? A successful career?
You know what to do – carve out time with your significant other for date nights and conversations. Drink water, exercise regularly, eat veggies. Put in the work, go above and beyond what is expected.
Yes – we know what to do, but we don’t do it. Why? It’s not because you’re a loser, or somehow “less than”. It has to do with the inner work. Our thoughts, our beliefs, what we’re saying to ourselves – about ourselves, what we believe about ourselves, and how we see ourselves.
Let me be clear – the actions (the outer work) is not successful by itself, likewise, inner work alone will not create results.
Let’s define “inner work” - "Inner work" refers to the intentional process of self-exploration and self-reflection aimed at understanding, transforming, and aligning your thoughts, beliefs, and emotional patterns. It involves things like mindfulness, meditation, journaling, and spiritual practices that help us gain insight into our inner selves, address limiting beliefs, and cultivate a healthier, more authentic mindset. In the context of thoughts and beliefs, inner work is about identifying and reshaping the core aspects of your identity that influence how you perceive and interact with the world, fostering personal growth and spiritual development.
That’s a lot. Which is why we often want to avoid it, skirt around it, not do it, because it feels really hard. I’m going to make it super simple for you to be able to be successful with both inner work and your results.
Let’s go back to what we find ourselves saying… Not to our dearest friend, but to ourselves. They usually are not kind things, loving things, compassionate things.
I know I’ve said not very kind things to myself. “I can’t”, “I shouldn’t”, and “I don’t know how”….
Reading a book by Sarah Jakes Roberts called Power Moves – a light bulb went off! She was talking about Adam and Eve, who were created in the image of GOD and their power tank was full.
“GOD positioned them not to just see the power around them but to explore the power within. There was no such thing as “I can’t”, “I shouldn’t”, or “I don’t know how”. GOD charged them in Genesis 1, and that mission, combined with their undiluted sense of being made in His image, was enough for them to turn a charge into an action.”
WOW! There was no such belief as “I can’t”. But with the fall of Adam and Eve, the enemy stole what was ours. That confidence in our GOD given abilities and the knowledge that GOD is there to give us direction and wisdom.
So, how can we take back what was stolen? Sarah Jakes Roberts has a great suggestion – what do we need to be asking ourselves? “What do I need to believe?” and “What belief do I need to release?”
Thoughts and beliefs are the power behind the inner work to achieve your goals. You may think of them as a “mindset”. Have you ever said “my mindset gets in the way of reaching my goals”? That could be anything from attitude, frame of mind, inclination, mental state, or even ethos.
What belief would you need to have to move you forward? What belief would you need to release?
Your thoughts directly lead to your feelings, your feelings Influence your actions, and your actions predict your results.
I would like to posit there’s a step before the thoughts. It’s your identity. What do you believe about your identity, about who you are? How do you see yourself? Your identity (what you believe about yourself) directly shapes your thoughts, and from there creates your feelings, influences your actions, and then your results.
I’ll give you an example…
Let’s say I identify as an old person. There will be a few people that agree with that! Yet the result I want is to have a strong and healthy body.
Identity - I believe I’m old.
My thoughts that come from that identity is “It’s hard for me to lose weight”, “It’s hard for me to exercise because I’m not strong anymore”.
My feelings that are generated from those thoughts are: frustration, grief, sadness, inadequacy, and what’s the use?
My actions when I’m feeling frustrated, sad, and inadequate? What are my actions when I say “what’s the use?” I wouldn’t even bother going to the gym. Why should I, it won’t make any difference.
My results? The less I move, the less healthy I eat, the older I’ll feel and the older my body will look.
That is the direct opposite of what I want my results to be in the first place!
Inner work can be as deep as you would like to go, or you can start with a few simple steps to transform your identity, your thoughts, and your results.
What are the 4 steps?
Unlearn
Relearn
Commit to being willing to practice
Affirmations
Unlearn
If I hold the belief that I am old, it's likely something I picked up along the way. Most often, this comes from social media and the habit of comparing myself to others. Additionally, advertising, movies, and other media constantly showcase an endless stream of stunning (and often digitally enhanced) women, making it easy to feel inadequate in comparison.
How do we unlearn?
Unlearning involves a deliberate process of challenging and replacing old, limiting beliefs with new, empowering ones. If I learned it in the first place, I can unlearn it! Here are some steps to guide you through the unlearning process:
Awareness: - Identify the specific beliefs you want to unlearn. Reflect on how these beliefs were formed and their impact on your life. If I am identifying as old, was it because of the old “compare and despair”?
Challenge the Belief: - Question the validity of the belief. Ask yourself if it is based on facts or perceptions influenced by external sources like media or societal norms.
Gather Evidence: - Look for evidence that contradicts the limiting belief. Seek out examples that support a more positive and empowering perspective. This is a powerful key towards the next step of “Relearn”
Relearn
What would be an identity that would support my goal of feeling strong and healthy?
How about if I choose to identify as a "Vibrant, Empowered, and a Resilient Woman."
Not only can I relearn an identity, I get to choose! I can choose “old”, or I can choose “vibrant, empowered, and resilient”!
Next, is to Commit to be willing to practice
Say out loud:
"I am willing to practice being vibrant, empowered, and resilient (or whatever your new identity is). I might not know exactly what that looks like or how to achieve it, but that's okay. I don't need to have all the answers right now; I’m just being open to the journey of practice."
Lastly, Affirmations
If I’m going to commit to practice being vibrant, empowered, and resilient, here are a few affirmations that I might use.
I am full of energy and enthusiasm for life
I engage in activities that bring me joy
I take charge of my health
I make informed decisions that align with my values and goals
I bounce back from setbacks and challenges with a positive mindset
I embrace growth and learning opportunities
I am vibrant, empowered, and resilient!
Can you feel the difference by embracing this identity? I will cultivate a mindset and lifestyle that will align with my goal of feeling strong and healthy. I will and you will too.
Let’s run through the sequence…
My identity is vibrant, empowered, and resilient
My thoughts are I have the energy and enthusiasm to tackle whatever comes my way. I trust in God's plan for me and feel confident in His purpose for my life.
When I have those thoughts, my feelings are – joy and happiness, I’ll feel confident, I feel positive about myself and life in general.
When my feelings are positive and joyful, my actions will be – making healthy food choices, exercising, walking, and enjoying movement that suits my body.
When I’m doing those actions, what do you think my results will be? Absolutely! They will be I am strong and healthy!
I can transform my success by adopting a new identity – an identity that supports my goals.
And using these 4 steps you can do the same!
Unlearn
Relearn
Commit to practicing
Affirmations
4 steps to completely transform your outcome. Whatever your goal – physical, relational, vocational – this process works. The inner work in those 4 steps creates the foundation to support any outer work (actions) you want to take.
Achieving your goals requires more than just external actions; it demands a deep and intentional commitment to inner work. By unlearning limiting beliefs, relearning empowering identities, committing to practice, and reinforcing with affirmations, you create a strong foundation for success. Remember, "Inner Work Makes the Dream Work." Embrace your new chosen identity, trust in God's plan, and confidently pursue your path. With these steps, you can transform your thoughts, feelings, actions, and ultimately, your results. You have the power within you to achieve your best and most fulfilling life.
If the process feels overwhelming, or you’re just not clear how to walk through it with your own personal situation or goals, I’d love to offer you a free, short (20 minute) laser coaching session. Click on the link and schedule a time for you to get clear on your identity, thoughts, feelings, and actions so you can achieve your goal.
If you know you want to make a change, that you want more from life, and you’re ready to set some goals, book a time for "From Dreaming to Doing: Faith-infused Visioning" a unique 90-minute visioning session that is guided by your Christian faith. From envisioning your dream to setting achievable goals and creating manageable action steps, this session integrates the principles of your faith without feeling selfish or guilty, empowering you to walk in alignment with GOD’s purpose for your life.
Want to know about Intuitive Eating?
Read the free eBook “3 Keys to Intuitive Eating”. Rooted in the principles of Intuitive Eating, this easy-to-read eBook offers practical keys to nurturing your physical and spiritual well-being through the lens of the Christian faith.
You’ll be able to implement the three transformative keys to Intuitive Eating, by listening to your body’s signals and embrace foods that nourish both your physical health and your spiritual growth. You’ll be able to align your eating habits with the principles of God’s design, so you’ll find balance and fulfillment in your relationship with food.
You will discover a sense of calmness and freedom around food as you release the chains of rigid restrictions and dieting. Through the wisdom of Intuitive Eating and the guiding principles of your Christian beliefs, you’ll learn to honor your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit, treating it with love and respect.
Dear readers and wellness enthusiasts, thank you for joining me on this journey toward a healthier and more faith-integrated life.
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Blessings on your journey!
Debra Loader is a Christian Health and Wellness Coach, a Christian Life Coach, as well as a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach (NBC-HWC).
She helps women integrate their Christian faith into their health and wellness journey to find greater motivation and resilience. You can contact Debra at debra@debraloaderlivingwell.com or 810-287-4096.